Anger is not an emotion unknown to mankind. It has affected all of us at some point in life. No one can claim that they have never burst out in anger or have not had at least one encounter where they lost control of their emotions.
When you fail to manage intense emotions such as anger, it can lead to countless problems. You can say things that you may regret later, yell at someone, threaten someone or break something special or expensive.
It is not just about material loss. Anger can lead you to lose your relationships, friendships, and families. It can also develop health problems such as blood pressure, heart problems, digestive issues, and much more.
When managing anger, no one will ever tell you never to get angry. Instead, it involves healthily expressing your anger and getting control over it. You can learn to cope with it and manage it in day-to-day life.
Here are a few essential tips that can help you manage anger and regain control of your life.
Rethink Your Words
Most people with no control over their anger understand the challenges of guilt. In the heat of the moment, they may say something they will regret later. It happens to everyone. But, over time, it can become unhealthy and affect your mental and physical health.
Instead of living your life with guilt daily, take a deep breath before speaking. Even if your first instinct is to yell at or push the person in front of you, make a conscious decision to stop yourself. You can also count to ten and backward to divert your attention from the situation.
When you take your time to think about the situation and talk to your Mental Health Providers, you will likely realize that the situation is not as extreme as your mind initially suggested. You will have enough time to contemplate the situation and understand the consequences you may have to face.
For example, if you are stuck in a traffic jam, you may feel like getting off your car and getting in a fight with the driver in front of you. However, when you rethink your actions and words, you can save yourself and the people around you from a lot of trouble.
People think there is no way to have a productive discussion with an angry person. It happens because angry people are usually seen bursting out physically or verbally. In such a situation, no one can have a healthy discussion.
When angry people realize their opinion is not heard, they may stop expressing themselves. It is natural for them to feel that their opinion may not matter. However, that is not true. If you feel your opinion is not heard when you are fuming, try another way.
Try collecting your emotions when you think that the conversation is getting heated. Try counting to ten or take a deep breath. When you collect your calm, identify the reasons for your anger. Following that, talk to the person in front of you. Instead, tell them what upset you.
Instead of using harsh words or sentences, try starting your sentences with “I.” You can express your anger or sadness to the next person by starting your sentences with “I feel,” “I am upset,” or “I regret.” You will notice the difference in the reaction from people right away.
The people around you will not overhear your words, covered by anger. Instead, they will understand what you say and get behind your anger outbursts. It starts when you get ahead of your outbursts and manage your emotions.
Let Go of the Grudges
Sometimes, people may not realize where their anger is rooted from. Most people with anger issues are not even concerned by the reason for their anger. All they know is that anger is the only way to express their emotions and talk to someone else.
One must realize that no one is born angry or sad. The little things in our life define the direction of our emotions and responses to the world. One of the things that can take an emotional toll is the grudges one holds. Grudges make our souls bitter before we can even realize it.
Holding on to grudges and hoping you will be repaid for your suffering will only hurt you in the long run. Over time, you may let anger take over your favorable feelings. As a result, you may feel bitter and angry in your day-to-day life.
One has to realize that forgiveness is a powerful tool. When you forgive someone, you realize that feelings of anger and bitterness no longer hold you down. Just as little changes in your life can make you angry, such changes can also help you regain control of your life.